Hurtling towards Christmas?
I wonder, are you hurtling towards Christmas?
A few people have asked whether there’s any seasonality to my business. For the majority of my work, there isn’t really a pattern.
But I have noticed one pattern with my coaching clients - I get quite a few requests in January.
And it’s not just part of the ‘New Year, New You’ self-improvement vibe that can go on around that time of year.
It’s something much more specific.
It’s people coming to me saying they had an awful few months before Christmas, and that how they were working isn’t sustainable. They’re not sure how to move forwards, they just know they don’t want it to be more of the same. And they’re not sure if that’s possible.
They hurtled towards Christmas, in an all guns blazing, no time to think (or look after themselves), mode.
They got to Christmas, and then they crashed.
This year, I have also felt a little bit hurtle-y. I actually started drafting this email at the start of October. It’s been sitting in my drafts folder ever since, because I’ve been prioritising client work in a quite full-on few months.
This morning at Mindful Co-Working I’m prioritising writing to you, even though there are a gazillion other things on my list.
Because I know I’m not the only one that can get pulled into hurtle-mode.
I’d like to share my ‘advice to self’, in the hope it helps you too.
1. Prioritise what you need now
I have a tendency, when I’m very busy, to think something along the lines of ‘I just need to get through the next couple of weeks, and then things will calm down a bit’.
It makes perfect sense as a coping mechanism - I’m effectively chunking things down so they feel less overwhelming.
But there are two problems with this approach.
The first is one I think you’ll probably relate to - the calmer time often doesn’t arrive. Other things come in to fill that time and space I could see ahead.
So I can stay in this ‘just get through the next bit in front of me’ for much longer than expected, and longer than is helpful if I want to avoid burning out.
It’s far too easy to delay rest, headspace, important life admin, or other things we need time for, for a day that never really comes.
I think the uncomfortable answer is that we have to make time for our needs WITHIN the busy patch.
One way of doing this is making a baseline level that is non-negotiable. One of mine is doing my Three Good Things exercise each week. I always make time to do it, no matter how chaotic life is feeling at the time. (External accountability really helps me with that!).
What might your non-negotiable baselines be? Could you pick just one thing to help meet your needs amidst the busy patch?
2. Focus on enjoyment
Then we come to the second problem of this ‘I just need to get through the next bit of time’ approach.
I don’t want my work to be something that I just need to ‘get through’. At least, not for any sustained period of time.
This is particularly stark to me now that I fundamentally love the work I do - it’s a red flag if I start to see my work this way.
But even when I was doing other kinds of work I didn’t love so much, I didn’t like the idea of a key part of my life (in terms of hours, energy, and potential meaning) to be something I was just ‘getting through’.
I think life is far too short, and precious, for that.
Over the last few months, when I’ve felt pinch-point busy, I’ve deliberately focused on enjoyment.
I’ve deliberately noticed the things I’ve really enjoyed about my working day or week (The Three Good Things exercise helps!).
And I’ve caught myself when I’ve been looking ahead and felt that sense of ‘get through it’ creep in. For example, looking at a big client workshop in the diary, I reminded myself how much I love it once I’m in the room with people.
I’ve savoured all the highlights, and it has helped SO much.
When we're in ‘get through it mode’, it's all too easy for EVERYTHING to become something we just need to get through. All those things we do enjoy about our working life - big or small - get tarred with the same, grey, hurtle-y brush.
3. Accept you won’t get everything done
As I write this, I’m coming off the back of a week of leave, followed by a week where I was ill, and I’m still not feeling 100%.
I have a bit of a backlog of dropped balls, as well as all the things I hoped I’d have time for once the calmer period hit in December (see point 1!).
Realistically, I just won’t get everything done before Christmas. It’s an impossible task.
It’s basically always impossible to get everything done. But it’s particularly true in December.
We might mentally plot tasks into the ‘month of December’ bucket, but for many of us, December is not actually a month of work. Lots of us will take time off around Christmas. For me this year, the working month of December is three weeks at most.
Reminding myself of this is important to help me manage my expectations.
We can only do our best, and what our best looks like depends on the time, energy, and wellbeing we have at any one moment.
Once we accept we can’t get everything done, it’s much easier to focus on doing what matters most.
So what might sound like a cop-out is actually key to us doing our best.
4. Let go of perfectionism
If you have perfectionist traits like me, you’ll know that this is far easier said than done.
But, when we’re busy and hurtle-y, we have an opportunity to practise letting go of our perfectionist standards. They only add to the sense of pressure and overwhelm.
As I write this, my brain is coming up with all sorts of ideas about how I could make this newsletter better.
One thing it’s saying is ‘you need to spend more time proof-reading this and making it more concise’.
Yes, spending that time would make this newsletter better. But I think the ideas I’m sharing matter more than the odd typo, or an extra few seconds of reading time.
I have an opportunity to practise letting go. So I’m going to hit send, and go have some lunch instead.
I’m going to trust you won’t mind too much 💛
I hope this helps, and that you can give yourself some of what you need over the next few weeks.
Take care,
Heather x
